photo is on Porkbelly Press page
https://porkbellypress.com/hybrid/eldest-daughter you can buy a copy here.
A Review of “Eldest Daughter: a break-up story” by Megan Cannella
Reviewed by Sara Dobbie
In this hybrid collection of innovative poems and creative nonfiction, Megan Cannella strips bare the mother-daughter relationship. Newly released from Porkbelly Press, “Eldest Daughter: a break-up story,” is an exploration of love, hate, resentment, grief, obligation, insecurity, and a kind of healing. In Cannella’s signature fierce voice, she lays the cards on the table with undeniable emotional honesty.
Throughout the pieces the narrative evolves, telling the story of a child whose mother became swept up in grief over the loss of her husband. The mother is referred to as “Widow” and the child as “Eldest Daughter,” giving the pieces an ironic folkloric tilt which serves to strengthen the punches when they come. In “Eldest Daughter and Widow: Part One” Cannella writes:
“Shortly after Eldest Daughter’s third birthday, she became the mother of Widow.”
This idea of the weight of responsibility placed upon someone much too young to understand the implications carries through the works. The sense of trauma due to carelessness and self-involvement of the parental figure is central to the premise and lends a relatability to readers who have endured similar circumstances.
Like a lost child in a fairy-tale, Eldest Daughter carves out a path through the dark woods. She faces many adversities, firstly, a “dead daddy,” but more scarring are Widow’s crushing judgements handed out with a word, like in the first poem, “Interesting,” or a seemingly offhand comment layered in derision.
An overarching theme in the writing is the subject of body image and food. These issues stem from the negative nature of the mother who no doubt deludes herself into believing she is offering guidance when she is actually hurting the grown-up child, reopening old wounds repeatedly. In “Something Sweet for my Daughter, Love Mom,” Widow gives Eldest Daughter chocolate covered strawberries, with the remark that they are “mostly fruit.” The poignant final line of the poem conveys the deep impact on Eldest Daughter’s psyche.
“Everything she puts in her mouth is a trap.”
As an adult, Eldest Daughter is intelligent, witty, self-aware and funny. In spite of everything, she still yearns for that elusive mother-daughter connection. Cannella crafts a stunning piece of poetry in “Things I’ve Said to Both my Mother and Taco Bell” delivering swift jabs that tie years of suppressed damage together in a list of phrases and questions.
“Too much of you makes me sick.
Fiesta potatoes would make this better right now.
Why are you closed when I need you?
Why do I need you?”
In “Reasons I Didn’t Talk to my Mom on the 30th Anniversary of my Father’s Death,” anger comes to a boiling point. Eldest Daughter is preparing to call Widow, but when she does she gets no answer. In a surge of memories almost violent in their intensity, the pain and resentment is heavy.
“Why isn’t she answering my call? Doesn’t she realize I’m rising the fuck above like you do with terrible mothers when you still want them to love you?”
There is something so powerful in this narrative, a transformative realization that letting go may be the only answer for Eldest Daughter’s healing. In the final poem “Our Body” Cannella touches on inextricable generational connections, writing,
“Once upon a time
I was just an egg
in the ovary
of the fetus
tethered to my grandmothers life force.”
The takeaway is that Widow will always be part of Eldest Daughter’s life, and they are working on “handling big feelings and sharing” which Cannella quips is “ya know, progress.” The crux of the matter, the heart of the chapbook, lies in the acceptance that the situation is/was/will always be inherently bad and Eldest Daughter must take care of herself. Heart-breaking, yet revelatory, at times cynical, sardonic, vulnerable, and clever, this collection is a true work of deeply personal art.
Bio: Megan Cannella (she/they) is a neurodivergent Midwestern transplant currently living in Nevada. She is a Best of the Net and Pushcart Prize nominated poet and creative nonfiction writer, as well as a Fiction Co-Editor at Reckon Review. Their other chapbooks, I Redact You, Too (2022) and Confrontational Crotch and Other Real Housewife Musings (2021), are available at https://linktr.ee/mcannella. You can find Megan on Twitter at @meganncannella and on Instagram at @meeeeeancan.
Bio: Sara Dobbie is a Canadian writer from Fort Erie, Ontario. Her stories have appeared in Milk Candy Review, Fictive Dream, JMWW, Sage Cigarettes, New World Writing, Bending Genres, Ghost Parachute, Ruminate Online, Trampset, Ellipsis Zine, and elsewhere. Her chapbook “Static Disruption” is available from Alien Buddha Press. Her collection “Flight Instinct” is available from ELJ Editions. Follow her on Twitter @sbdobbie, and on Instagram at @sbdobwrites.
Fevers of the Mind 